AI Model Comparison

Best AI Model for

Dad Jokes

entertainment · Tested 2026-08

Overall Winners Across All Variations

Quality
Grok 4.3
Best Value
Qwen3 235B
Fastest
Llama 4 Maverick

The Take

The dirty secret of AI dad jokes: everyone plagiarizes the same three. “An impasta,” “impossible to put down,” and “outstanding in his field” showed up in nearly every model’s list — the internet’s dad-joke canon, regurgitated. Grok 4.3 was the exception, bringing genuinely fresh material (“Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet”). The other tell: a real dad never explains the joke, but GPT-4o, Gemini, and Mistral all opened with “Sure, here are three…” preambles. Qwen3 235B won every cost round and had the best programmer puns.

Volume test — can models produce five distinct groan-worthy pun-based dad jokes without repeats?

The Prompt

Give me five classic dad jokes. Pun-based, family-friendly, maximum groan. Number them 1-5. No explanations — a real dad doesn't explain the joke.

Model Results

GPT-5.6 Sol

  1. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.

  2. I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.

  3. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.

  4. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

  5. Want to hear a construction joke? I’m still working on it.

Metrics
Cost $0.0026
Time 3.3s
Words 57
100K Scaling
Cost $260
Tokens 12.1M
Duration 91.7h

GPT-5.2

  1. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
  2. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  3. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
  4. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
  5. I used to hate facial hair… but then it grew on me.
Metrics
Cost $0.0013
Time 3.2s
Words 61
100K Scaling
Cost $130
Tokens 13.2M
Duration 88.9h

GPT-4o

  1. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

  2. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.

  3. How do you organize a space party? You planet.

  4. I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

  5. What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.

Metrics
Cost $0.0009
Time 2.8s
Words 58
100K Scaling
Cost $90
Tokens 11.9M
Duration 77.8h

Claude Opus 5

  1. I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.

  2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.

  3. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

  4. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

  5. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.

Metrics
Cost $0.0054
Time 4.5s
Words 60
100K Scaling
Cost $540
Tokens 22.9M
Duration 125.0h

Claude Sonnet 4.6

  1. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.

  2. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.

  3. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

  4. Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.

  5. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll let it go.

Metrics
Cost $0.0016
Time 4.1s
Words 62
100K Scaling
Cost $160
Tokens 14.4M
Duration 113.9h

Gemini 2.5 Pro

  1. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  4. I wouldn’t buy anything with Velcro. It’s a total rip-off.
  5. “I’m hungry.” “Hi Hungry, I’m Dad.”
Metrics
Cost $0.0031
Time 13.0s
Words 55
100K Scaling
Cost $310
Tokens 44.3M
Duration 361.1h

Grok 4.3

Quality
  1. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
  2. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
  3. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
  4. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.
  5. Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floor? It was just a stage he was going through.
Metrics
Cost $0.0005
Time 6.3s
Words 78
100K Scaling
Cost $50
Tokens 32.7M
Duration 175.0h

DeepSeek V3

  1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  2. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  3. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  4. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
  5. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
Metrics
Cost $0.0002
Time 2.2s
Words 65
100K Scaling
Cost $20
Tokens 13.1M
Duration 61.1h

Qwen3 235B

Value
  1. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  2. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great view, but the food was no good — it had no atmosphere.
  3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  4. I asked the librarian if they had books about paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you…”
  5. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
Metrics
Cost $0.0001
Time 4.4s
Words 73
100K Scaling
Cost $10
Tokens 14.9M
Duration 122.2h

Llama 4 Maverick

  1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  2. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  3. Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be a sedan.
  4. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  5. Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fun-gi.
Metrics
Cost $0.0001
Time 1.9s
Words 73
100K Scaling
Cost $10
Tokens 16.4M
Duration 52.8h

Mistral Large 3

Speed

  1. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

  2. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.

  3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

  4. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

  5. How do you organize a space party? You planet.

Metrics
Cost $0.0006
Time 1.8s
Words 61
100K Scaling
Cost $60
Tokens 13.0M
Duration 50.0h

Kimi K2.5

  1. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.

  2. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity — it’s impossible to put down.

  3. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.

  4. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

  5. Why do seagulls fly over the ocean? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.

Metrics
Cost $0.0003
Time 2.1s
Words 74
100K Scaling
Cost $30
Tokens 15.9M
Duration 58.3h

Domain-specific humor — dad jokes for software engineers. Tests wordplay in a technical register.

The Prompt

Give me three dad jokes specifically for programmers. Still groan-worthy, still pun-based, but the punchline should land for someone who writes code. Number them 1-3.

Model Results

GPT-5.6 Sol

  1. Why do programmers prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs.

  2. Why did the developer go broke? Because they used up all their cache.

  3. Why was the JavaScript developer sad? Because they didn’t know how to null their feelings.

Metrics
Cost $0.0019
Time 7.1s
Words 41
100K Scaling
Cost $190
Tokens 10.0M
Duration 197.2h

GPT-5.2

  1. Why do programmers always confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct 31 == Dec 25.

  2. I told my code a joke… but it didn’t laugh. Turns out it was a runtime problem.

  3. My friend said he could fix my bug in one line. I said, “Cool—which line?” He said, “The one I’m going to delete.”

Metrics
Cost $0.0013
Time 3.8s
Words 57
100K Scaling
Cost $130
Tokens 13.2M
Duration 105.6h

GPT-4o

Sure, here are three programmer-themed dad jokes for you:

  1. Why do programmers always mix up Christmas and Halloween?

    • Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!

  2. How do you comfort a JavaScript bug?

    • You console it.

  3. Why did the developer go broke?

    • Because he used up all his cache!
Metrics
Cost $0.0008
Time 2.7s
Words 53
100K Scaling
Cost $80
Tokens 11.5M
Duration 75.0h

Claude Opus 5

  1. A SQL query walks into a bar, strolls up to two tables, and asks, “Mind if I join you?”

  2. Why did the programmer go broke? He blew through all his cache.

  3. My code has serious commitment issues. Every time I try to get it to settle down, it just branches off and pushes me away.

Metrics
Cost $0.0212
Time 12.2s
Words 58
100K Scaling
Cost $2120
Tokens 75.6M
Duration 338.9h

Claude Sonnet 4.6

Here are three programmer dad jokes:

1. Why do programmers prefer dark mode?

Because light attracts bugs.

2. A SQL query walks into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks…

“Can I join you?”

3. Why did the programmer quit his job?

Because he didn’t get arrays.

(a raise)

Metrics
Cost $0.0015
Time 3.7s
Words 53
100K Scaling
Cost $150
Tokens 13.7M
Duration 102.8h

Gemini 2.5 Pro

Of course. Here are three groan-worthy dad jokes for programmers:

  1. Why do programmers always mix up Christmas and Halloween? Because Oct 31 equals Dec 25.

  2. I wanted to write a joke about an infinite loop… …but I couldn’t find a good ending.

  3. A programmer’s spouse tells them, “You need to go to the store and get a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen.” The programmer comes back with 12 loaves of bread.

Metrics
Cost $0.0046
Time 25.1s
Words 79
100K Scaling
Cost $460
Tokens 60.9M
Duration 697.2h

Grok 4.3

  1. Why do programmers confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct 31 == Dec 25.
  2. A SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables, and asks, “Mind if I join you?”
  3. Why did the developer go broke? He used up all his cache.
Metrics
Cost $0.0004
Time 10.5s
Words 45
100K Scaling
Cost $40
Tokens 28.9M
Duration 291.7h

DeepSeek V3

  1. My friend keeps confusing his “null” with his “undefined” — I told him they’re basically the same, but it still doesn’t type check out.

  2. Why did the programmer always mix up Christmas and Halloween? Because Oct 31 == Dec 25.

  3. I wrote a function to help me find a lost item, but it still hasn’t returned anything. I guess it’s stuck in an infinite loop.

Metrics
Cost $0.0002
Time 3.1s
Words 68
100K Scaling
Cost $20
Tokens 13.5M
Duration 86.1h

Qwen3 235B

Quality

Why do Java developers wear glasses?
Because they can’t C#.

I was gonna tell you a joke about UDP…
But you might not get it.

Never trust a programmer who uses float for money.
They’re bound to lose some in the precision.

Metrics
Cost $0.0001
Time 2.2s
Words 45
100K Scaling
Cost $10
Tokens 11.2M
Duration 61.1h

Llama 4 Maverick

Speed

Here are three programmer-specific dad jokes:

  1. Why do programmers prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs.
  2. Why did the developer go to the doctor? They had a virus… and a few bugs to debug.
  3. Why did the programmer quit their job? Because they didn’t get arrays.

I hope these make you groan and chuckle!

Metrics
Cost $0.0001
Time 1.9s
Words 57
100K Scaling
Cost $10
Tokens 14.5M
Duration 52.8h

Mistral Large 3

Here are three groan-worthy dad jokes tailor-made for programmers—guaranteed to make you facepalm while debugging:

  1. Why did the programmer quit his job? Because he didn’t get arrays—but his boss kept saying, “You’re not indexing high enough!”

  2. Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they can’t C# (see sharp)… and also because they refuse to use Python’s snake_case for fashion.

  3. Why was the function so lonely? Because it had too many parameters—but no arguments to keep it company. (And it kept throwing NullReferenceException at love.)

Metrics
Cost $0.0010
Time 2.4s
Words 87
100K Scaling
Cost $100
Tokens 18.7M
Duration 66.7h

Kimi K2.5

  1. Why do programmers prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs.

  2. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised — which, in fairness, is not an exception I had caught.

  3. “We need to talk about your code.” “Is it my indentation?” “It’s all your indentation. Every single byte of it.”

Metrics
Cost $0.0003
Time 2.4s
Words 58
100K Scaling
Cost $30
Tokens 13.9M
Duration 66.7h

Precision over volume — one maximally groan-inducing one-liner. Tests comedic judgment.

The Prompt

Write the single most groan-inducing dad-joke one-liner you can produce. Just one. Make it hurt.

Model Results

GPT-5.6 Sol

I only know 25 letters of the alphabet—I don’t know y.
Metrics
Cost $0.0016
Time 3.7s
Words 11
100K Scaling
Cost $160
Tokens 8.0M
Duration 102.8h

GPT-5.2

I used to hate facial hair… but then it grew on me.
Metrics
Cost $0.0003
Time 2.5s
Words 12
100K Scaling
Cost $30
Tokens 4.8M
Duration 69.4h

GPT-4o

I’m reading a book on anti-gravity—it’s impossible to put down!
Metrics
Cost $0.0002
Time 2.4s
Words 10
100K Scaling
Cost $20
Tokens 4.7M
Duration 66.7h

Claude Opus 5

I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough — so now I just loaf around, which is honestly the yeast of my problems.
Metrics
Cost $0.0223
Time 16.1s
Words 27
100K Scaling
Cost $2230
Tokens 77.6M
Duration 447.2h

Claude Sonnet 4.6

“I’m reading a book about anti-gravity — it’s impossible to put down.”
Metrics
Cost $0.0004
Time 2.8s
Words 12
100K Scaling
Cost $40
Tokens 5.4M
Duration 77.8h

Gemini 2.5 Pro

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get soap in your mouth, and then it’s a soap opera.
Metrics
Cost $0.0012
Time 20.9s
Words 22
100K Scaling
Cost $120
Tokens 20.2M
Duration 580.6h

Grok 4.3

I’m terrified of speed bumps, but I’m slowly getting over it.
Metrics
Cost $0.0003
Time 14.7s
Words 11
100K Scaling
Cost $30
Tokens 22.8M
Duration 408.3h

DeepSeek V3

I’m afraid for the calendar—its days are numbered.
Metrics
Cost $0.0000
Time 1.7s
Words 8
100K Scaling
Cost $0
Tokens 4.2M
Duration 47.2h

Qwen3 235B

Value
I’m reading a book on anti-gravity… it’s impossible to put down.
Metrics
Cost $0.0000
Time 1.5s
Words 11
100K Scaling
Cost $0
Tokens 5.1M
Duration 41.7h

Llama 4 Maverick

Speed
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
Metrics
Cost $0.0000
Time 1.4s
Words 14
100K Scaling
Cost $0
Tokens 7.7M
Duration 38.9h

Mistral Large 3

Here it is, the nuclear option of dad jokes:

“I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.”

(You’re welcome. I’ll be here all week—please don’t tip.)

Metrics
Cost $0.0003
Time 1.9s
Words 32
100K Scaling
Cost $30
Tokens 7.5M
Duration 52.8h

Kimi K2.5

Quality
I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.
Metrics
Cost $0.0001
Time 1.7s
Words 10
100K Scaling
Cost $10
Tokens 6.5M
Duration 47.2h

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